For ALL Women and Girls: Rights. Equality. Empowerment.

By Pascaliah Nyaboke (YSB EU delegation to Kenya)

“Endelea kuletea watu iyo human rights yako utatwangwa na uyo mzee wako! Ntakuona hapa jioni.”

“Hiyo human rights wachia kwa ofisi, ukikuja nyumbani uambie mzee mambo ya human rights, ntatukanwa, wataniuliza huyu mwanamke hakufunza msichana wake tabia?”

“Mzee akisema kitu hiyo ni final, yeye ndio kichwa ya boma. Ukianza kufungua mdomo utapigwa mpaka ushangae na nisikuone hapa.”

“Lazima uolewe, usipoolewa utakaa kwa nani? Hata akikupiga, huwezi pigwa bila makosa. Uyo mwanaume sio mwendawazimu.”

These are not lines from a play. They are not excerpts from a novel about an oppressive past. They are the words I hear in my own home, within the walls that should shelter me, protect me, and foster equality. These statements are not anomalies but rather rituals, greetings in their own right. Their familiarity does not lessen their weight. Each time I hear them, my heart fractures anew.

It is an agonizing contradiction—spending my days fighting for human rights, standing firm against gender-based violence (GBV), and advocating for a world where women and girls live free from fear. Yet, within my own home, the very concept of women’s rights is dismissed as foreign, impractical, even laughable. How do you explain to a father, an uncle, a brother, that GBV is not just a headline but a lived reality? That equality is not an attack on masculinity, but an assertion of humanity?

Not long ago, as I sat in my family home, I overheard a casual phone conversation: a cousin had been brutally beaten by her husband, rushed to the hospital, and required stitches. The response? Blame. “She is hard-headed,” they said. “She must have done something to provoke him.”

A while ago, my younger brother almost knocked my teeth out simply because he didn’t want to be told what to do. A man, according to my family, should not take orders from a woman. A woman exists to serve, to submit, to be silent. This is what we are told. This is what we are raised to believe.

But if this is what is taught at home, then how do we ever expect society to change? If we preach about justice in public but turn a blind eye to the injustices in our own homes, aren’t we living a lie?

The Need for Change at the Root

This year’s International Women’s Day theme—For ALL Women and Girls: Rights. Equality. Empowerment.—calls for action to unlock equal rights, power, and opportunities for all. But how do we empower young girls when they are raised in households that strip them of agency before they even step outside? How do we teach human rights in spaces where women’s voices are dismissed before they are even heard? The truth is, empowerment must start at home. Capacity building and education need to take root in the very environments where patriarchy is most deeply entrenched. And it is not enough to focus solely on girls—boys, men, entire families must be part of the conversation. Rethinking Our Approach to Gender Equality Education We have to ask ourselves: Are we approaching this education the wrong way? The current model often preaches to the converted—targeting schools, workplaces, and institutions where conversations around gender equality are welcomed. But what about the homes where a girl is only to be seen, not heard? What about the families that believe a woman’s worth is measured by her ability to endure suffering in silence? Perhaps we need to rethink our methods, ensuring they are culturally sensitive and deeply rooted in community understanding. The following approaches could help:

• Integrating Gender Education into Family Conversations – Rather than waiting for formal education systems to teach about equality, these discussions should start at the dinner table. We need to create safe spaces where daughters can challenge outdated beliefs and sons can unlearn toxic masculinity. 
• Engaging Fathers and Male Relatives – Many gender equality programs focus on women and girls, but true change requires male allies. We need structured dialogues that involve fathers, uncles, and brothers in dismantling harmful traditions.
• Using Storytelling to Foster Empathy – Real-life stories, like my cousin’s harrowing experience, should not just be whispered about in condemnation of the victim but shared to illustrate the devastating impact of GBV. When people can see themselves in these narratives, they are more likely to question their biases.
• Community-Based Initiatives – Empowerment programs should be communitydriven, bringing in local leaders, religious figures, and grassroots organizations to challenge oppressive norms in ways that resonate culturally.
• Teaching Girls How to Navigate Hostile Environments – While we fight for systemic change, we must also equip young girls with the skills to survive within patriarchal households—helping them find allies, assert themselves strategically, and access external support when needed.

A Call to Action

As we commemorate International Women’s Day, let us remember that empowerment is not just about policies and laws; it is about changing mindsets, household by household, conversation by conversation. It is about ensuring that young girls are not just educated but believed, not just present but heard, not just resilient but truly free. For ALL women and girls, the fight for rights, equality, and empowerment must begin where oppression takes root—at home. If we are to build a feminist future where no one is left behind, we must first ensure that every girl can stand tall in her own home before she steps out into the world. And so I ask, how do we make sure our children—all our children—are equal, not just in theory, but in practice, in the very homes they are raised in? Because until that happens, no amount of advocacy outside our doors will ever be enough.